Home Depot Humor

      Charlie was installing a new door and found that one of the hinges was missing.           He asked his wife, Mary, if she would go to Home Depot and pick up a hinge.         Mary agreed to go....

Just Ask Sooz

  Dear Sooz:   I have a concern that I really need your help with. My boyfriend frequents this Restaurant/Bar he has been going to for years with his friends and one of the waitresses that works there is getting married.   She has...

Funny Questions With No Answers

    People come up to me on the street and ask me, “Sue, how do you ALWAYS come up with such funny topics?” I tell them…Well, it’s a matter of thinking OUTSIDE the box. Then they ask me, “What IS this box you are talking about?”   I...

Funny Things to Say on a Divorce Card

    1.    Knock knock…Who’s there?…..EXACTLY… SUCKER…Hehehehehehe…   2.    If at first you don’t succeed…Insert new Batteries….They’re better than YOU ever were anyway…   3.    I sincerely hope you have a better life now… “IN...

Just Ask Sooz—Baby/Toddler Edition

    Dear Sooz:   I am barely 2 months old so my 8 year old sister is writing this for me. So, here’s the thing. My Mother keeps waking my tired ass up every two hours to feed me. Don’t get me wrong, I like sucking on her nice warm...

Ten Fun Facts To Know About Sooz

1.   When I’m NOT working, I’m drinking. Oh wait, you already KNEW that one. How about…I once ate a  6 oz. cup of maggots on a 250.00 dollar dare. Of COURSE I was drunk…Did you even WONDER???? Gheese. 2.   I enjoy watching very old...

Flipper Goes Rogue

    Imagine in your head the dolphin Flipper. NOW imagine Flipper trained as a deadly Navy SEAL. Think of the possibilities. Cute, adorable, Smiley faced Flipper, strapped with automatic weapons and knives to his head and flippers.   ...

Just Ask Sooz

    Dear Sooz:   Did you see in the papers where a Judge gave permission to a guy to spank his wife? Thank goodness I say. Women are trying to take over the world and need to be put in their place every now and then. I applaud the...

Oops, I Forgot Masturbation Monday...

    Pictures of you dancing in my head, make my soul quiver with intensity.   I FEEL you as your full lips meet mine, our heads together, and your hands upon my bosom.   I feel myself flush, and the wetness from within is like a...