Just Ask Sooz


Dear Sooz:

Five years ago, my husband and I divorced. Here is the problem I am facing. You see, when my husband and I divorced, it was a tempestuous relationship with lots of hurt feelings.

Naturally, he went to his parents for comfort and support afterwards. The problem is, I love his mom and would like to carry on a relationship with her. Do you think this is even possible, or should I just leave well enough alone and  move on?

I really would appreciate your help on this one. Thanks.

Doleful Daughter in Law     


Dear Doleful Daughter in Law:

I see NO reason, just because you and her son have split that this should affect your relationship with her. Call her up, invite her to lunch, let HER be the judge.

If she wishes to continue her relationship with you then all is well, if NOT, drop it like a hot potato and move on. You can only push fate so far. Good Luck…


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Comments (5)

  1. jaageet

    Sooz, you are an ass. You see no reason? Are you blind and daft as well? Doleful is screwed up and you are steering that dingbat into a mess. Doleful’s relationship with her husband is over. Doleful’s love for the mother-in-law is a feeling of guilt for messing up the marriage.Doleful should move on and spare the mother-in-law more grief over her son’s misery.

    January 20, 2017
  2. rebecca2013

    There is no reason to end a relationship of friendship. The only caveat is not bringing up the previous marriage and issues, otherwise it’s not harmful to engage in a friendship. I agree you can gauge whether or not to continue over a luncheon. Dr. Rebecca.

    January 20, 2017
  3. noahbody

    I agree with you. Friendships don’t need to end just because her relationship with her son went sour. But she may not feel that way especially if he went running to mommy and daddy with all sorts of horror stories.

    January 20, 2017
  4. Munkyman

    That really depends on the son & how little she may be devoted to him.
    I managed to stay friendly with an ex’s mother, we were not friends anymore… just friendly.
    Instead of having lunch together now we just stop & chat if we see each other out.
    To do otherwise would be messing with the mother child relationship & that’s not cool.
    He could be 60 & he’s still her baby. He can be as wrong as wrong can be & he’s still her baby.
    It’s possible to remain friends & far easier if there are children, but it’s not very likely.

    January 20, 2017
  5. fierylady

    I agree. If the relationship was good to begin with, there is no reason, both parties withstanding, to end it!

    January 20, 2017